In the last 12 years we’ve been blessed to be apart of some pretty amazing moments. By far some of our favorites during that time have been surprise proposals. Time has passed, trends have changed, ideas have become more elaborate, but one thing has remained consistent, the moment. With this, one of the biggest changes we’ve seen over the past couple of years has been the addition of incorporating family and/or friends into your surprise proposal. It’s something that we’ve seen first hand can really add to the surprise element of the moment and experience for your soon to be fiance, but there are some careful considerations to make before deciding to include the entire family into your proposal session. This blog is for our clients who are intending to incorporate friends and/or family into their jackson hole proposal and some considerations to make before you finalize that decision. The ultimate goal is to help ensure that everything goes smooth for surprise proposal so you still have your moment without any interference.
Boundaries
At the risk of possibly offending family, we are going to keep it real with you guys. One of the most important things you can do for a proposal where you are going to involve family and/or friends is establishing boundaries ahead of time. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve had someone plan their proposal get everything in place and then due to pressure from family and friends, they cave in to switch up the entire plan they had initially envisioned. If your plan was for a more intimate private proposal for just the two of you to have that moment, stick with it. If you decide to include family or friends as a part of your proposal and you have a vision/plan already set in place, don’t be afraid to say no to proposed changes from your soon to be in laws. Trust me we’ve seen it. If you start making concessions to modify your plan for outside family influences, this will eventually turn into your family’s proposal and you will just be along for the ride. I would say this happens with about half of the proposals we see where our clients decide to include family and friends (hence the reason for the blog). Remember, this is your proposal, stick to what you are wanting for the two of you, and make sure your families respect that. If they won’t, you may want to consider keeping it just the two of you.
Have a plan in place (for everyone)
This goes beyond having a location and time in mind for your proposal here in Jackson Hole. This also means having a plan in place for how you intend to incorporate family into your session. We’ve seen a lot of different scenarios that can work well so it’s just a matter of picking one that you think won’t give away the surprise and that will work for your family/friends in terms of timing, group size, etc. We’ve had families be in on it from the get go where mom sets up a “family session” for all of you and at some point during the session you will propose. We’ve seen it be a private proposal and then family and friends pop out of their cars afterwards. We’ve also seen it where you go out for an early family dinner all together and stop off at an overlook to capture a few sunset photos or take some quick cell phone shots since your all dressed up. There are multiple plans and ways to incorporate family and friends into your proposal, it’s just a matter of choosing a plan you think will best fit your vision and families.
Make sure everyone is on the same page
This is probably the most key component for planning a proposal that includes family or friends. The thing we have seen most is parents not being on the same page so reaching out to us to try and set up an entirely new plan because they didn’t realize you had a plan in place. Or your proposal being delayed because parents didn’t have all the information they needed and thus they got lost on the way to trying to find the location. We’ve even had parents jump in our way during the middle of the proposal with their cell phones because they didn’t know to keep a clear line of site for the photographers. In any event, what we most often see when something does go slightly awry with a group proposal is people just not knowing what to do. Making sure everyone is on the same page is crucial for making sure everything goes smoothly for your big moment.
As we alluded to in the beginning of this blog, this one is all about making sure everything goes as close to perfect as possible for your special moment. If you do plan on including friends or family during your surprise proposal session, we strongly recommend having the above 3 things in place to avoid any awkward moments and to avoid stressing over the little things that will inevitably pop up as you get closer. If you’ve established clear boundaries, put together a solid plan, and communicated that clearly so everyone is on the same page, your odds of everything going off without a hitch are going much higher. As always, if you’re reading this and that little light in your head has gone off with an idea or concern, reach out and let us know! We’re always happy to help!
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